Is Self-care SELFISH?

I have a complicated history with the word SELF and I think it's because the emphasis is on self that transitions to SELFISH.

As a female in my generation and heritage, I was taught from an early age to put others before myself, to nurture and care for others, but to minimize what I needed or felt.

“Selfish” was a nasty label to put on anyone, and especially to be avoided as a woman.

As I matured, I had to unlearn a lot of the teachings of my earlier life. I have come to realize how critically important it is to take care of myself.

In fact, self-care is the opposite of being selfish because when I am at my absolute best, at the peak of my performance levels, I can do so much more for others.

Self-care is not one single area of focus, it is a balancing act of physical, emotional, financial, and spiritual care.

Self-care might be scheduling a facial or investing in getting my hair done.

Self-care might be hiring a coach, advisor trainer.

Self-care may be a retreat by myself or with a girlfriend or turning off my phone for 18 hours.

Self-care is saying NO.

Whatever, it takes to love and nurture myself is good because it makes me feel healthier, more positive, and more prepared to show up and have a greater impact.

My mother was an incredible, selfless woman. She endured a lot of hardship, and sacrificed a great deal for her children and her family. She sacrificed so much that she died at a too young age of 59 years. I am convinced her untimely death resulted from always putting herself last.

I cannot stress enough to all of my female friends, and all women out here in the world, how important it is to look after ourselves in every way that is significant and sustainable for us!

I also now know that what I need for self-care changes as I grow and transform.

It is so important to listen to myself and to be aware of what I need to feel loved and cared for and refreshed and recharged regularly.

As I evolve, what I need changes also.

What have you learned about self-care?

Please share your best tips, ideas and wisdom for Loving Thy Selfie and inspire other women to put their oxygen mask on first!